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I am Eric’s Wife. I am also mother to two teenagers on the very cusp of adulthood, the founding director of Scripture from the Heart, an avid world watcher, bold and insecure at once. I serve a merciful God and I love a guy who makes my knees weak. This is where I write about it all.  Thank you for reading!

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Advice: How to Calm Concerns if You are Bill Gates

June 9, 2020

This will be a very specific piece of advice, but it could very likely be used by just about any one of us if we find ourselves needing to explain to a hyper anxious crowd that we mean them no harm.

Vaccines as a means of immunotherapy have their place and I know society benefits. Also, vaccines. are. immunotherapy. and each one should be well researched and studied for efficacy before adding it to the immune system’s work load. Does it help or hinder? People are not wrong to ask questions. In fact, raising questions is an obligation of anyone who is piloting a body around that they intend to operate for a hundred years or so.

Bill Gates is a multi-billionaire, recognized monopolizer, socially awkward, web search monopolizer, artificial meat financier, vaccine financier, advocate for reproductive health services for all (read: abortions and sterilization. I mean, really, Melinda.), and also, he gives billions to charity- and he owns the charity. In the wake of COVID 19, Bill showed up everywhere, like he was the doctor of the world and his opinion was standard. Also, he released and almost immediately deleted a love letter of a documentary to his dear friend Marina Abramovic. If you saw it, and you are aware of her work, you know why he took it down right away, but you also might wonder why he featured her at all.

When Bill Gates emerged as captain of S.S. Save America From Climate Change, Disease, and Overpopulation, there was a large portion of the public who said, “Oh look! It’s that harmless billionaire computer genius who could just buy an island and retire, but instead he is spending his money and time to save us!!” There was also a large portion of the public who said, “Wait. Isn’t that the shady billionaire who thinks we need to reduce the population by many millions in order to save the planet? Isn’t he some sort of computer genius savant? What do you suppose is in those vaccines?”

To calm fears, Bill Gates said it was laughable to think he had anything to do with microchips that could be implanted into people using vaccines. Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft, nothing to do with microchips. Calm down, guys.

I am not concerned that there is some sort of elite ruling class goal to microchip us all. I am more concerned that a billionaire who made his billions by monopolizing the computer industry is now the chief investor in a vaccine industry that will make him even more billionaire-y. I’m not saying he is up to no good, I’ve never met him and I don’t know, but I do think he should read the room a little better before he calls concerns “laughable”.

So, my advice on how calm concerns if you are Bill Gates: Own it. Just own every bit of it. Say something like, “Hey guys. I am a every bit the nerd and number cruncher you think I am. I see how you might connect certain dots in my past to my present activities. No lol here. I really do see how you might think that I am like that kid Billy from The Incredibles. I cannot assure you that I am not an evil billionaire who has fingers in all kinds of population lowering efforts. What I can do is stop talking about population control and vaccines in the same sentence. I see now that that was a weird word choice.” Also, wear jeans and flip flops, maybe grow a soul patch on your chin.

This concludes my advice on how to calm concerns if you are Bill Gates. If this doesn’t work, and you are Bill Gates, your second option is to just manipulate Google searches and headlines using your many billions of dollars.

Tell me what you think! Let's talk about it.