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About Eric’s Wife

Some may say I am a "Stay at home Mom," but that is not even close. I am Eric's Wife. I have exhilarating strokes of genius, followed almost immediately by paralyzing pangs of self doubt and, for whatever reason, here is where I blog about it - warts and all. I serve a merciful God with a clumsy hand and at the end of each day I go to sleep thankful to be His servant and Eric's wife.

How to be a Proper Homemaker

May 29, 2008

Ha Ha.  Fooled you.  You saw that title and you were all, “Oooo.  Finally.  She’s going to tell us how to get it right.”

I was over at Brandy’s place this morning drinking coffee and telling her how I like my aprons when the question came up about how to be a proper homemaker.  (Fair and Honest:I wasn’t really at her place.  I’ve never even met her.  Blogging just makes me feel like it)

How do you do it right?  What is right?  How do you know if you are doing it wrong?  I saw this one blog and she was doing it right.  I’m not doing it like her.  I must be doing it wrong.

I know that our society’s favorite answer to “what is right?” is, “Right is what feels right to you”.  That is only partially true.  I know a stay at home Mom and what feels right to her is Montel Williams and company all day long with about five to ten minutes of actual interaction with her kids.  That’s not right.

It is because of Moms like her that I make a clear distinction in my head between “Stay at home Mom” and “Homemaker”.  I am more than a warm body keeping the lights on.  If you can say the same for yourself, then I think you are on a good path.

Brandy was working on my apron and I went to get some more coffee when we noticed that one of my kids was throwing a fit in the living room and had spilled red Kool-Aid on the carpet .  What is a professional Homemaker to do?

Dr.Spock be darned, I let ’em howl and moved the sofa over the stain.

Homemaking is messy.  It is chaotic.  It is confusing and the rules seem to change every five minutes.

“REAL Homemakers don’t have jobs outside the home.”

“REAL Homemakers have a second job outside the home.”

“REAL Homemakers homeschool their children.”

“REAL Homemakers make sandwiches and send their children to school.”

“REAL Homemakers make homemade baby food.”

“REAL Homemakers research Gerber labels.”

There is no such thing as a standard to homemaking.  But there is a standard to living.


What would Jesus do?

Jesus would serve your family as your family needs to be served.  Your family.

Be Jesus to your husband.  Be Jesus to your kids.  Let Jesus be Jesus to you.  His grace is sufficient for you.  Make your mistakes, but don’t stop.

My kids may go to the grocery with peanut butter on their faces and dirt under their nails.  I might have a cracker crumb that I know has been on the floor right by my computer desk for a week (I actually just took care of it.  Since I was thinking about it and all.).  My sweet little boy might hit your little boy and take his toy car.  All of this may be going on and I know I can still have confidence that Jesus is here.  He is here.  He is working.  He has my babies and my home in His hands.

Teach your kids about Jesus.  Bring Him into your home.  Turn off Montel.  That’s all you need to know about doing it proper.

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12 responses to “How to be a Proper Homemaker”

  1. Sarah says:

    Thank you for sharing your life with us.

  2. Thank you so much for this! I’m in tears! I most definitely owe you an apron for this one!

  3. Eric's Wife says:

    Your post got my brain pumping. We should totally have coffee more often. 🙂

  4. I am so very proud to say that not only am I a real life friend of Brandy’s, but I was actually her college suitemate for our first year.

    And yet somehow we survived w/o burning down the dorm. Miracles still happen, ya’ll.

    Brandy is even better is real life than she appears on her blog. If you got the chance to meet her, you’d be blown away.

  5. Andi Hawkins says:

    I decided to hold my baby to feed him this morning instead of propping his bottle in the bouncy seat like I usually do. Ha! Thank you for keeping me focused.

  6. Susan says:

    But I NEED my Montel.

    I kid.

    I appreciate your view on this, as in our lives we have chosen different “careers” and while my time away from my babies (and Montel) kills me nearly everyday it is the path I have chosen and will follow through with, no matter how difficult and bitter it may be. But I know that I am a homemaker, maybe not in everybodies eyes. But I know I am because of the home I have made for my family.

    And I have made cookies three days in a row for goodness sake- all in the evenings after my work outside the home has been completed for the day.

    But seriously, cookies, three days in a row!

  7. Montel Shmontel. I’ll take Jesus Shmesus

  8. Kathy Estrada says:

    Thank you for your comments Amy. You are right on. Thank you also Susan. You ARE also a homemaker!! I very much enjoy reading both of you.
    I just wanted to tell you.

  9. Sarah says:

    Absolutley right on!! LOVE this post, thanks!

  10. Eric's Wife says:

    Susan, I agree with everything you said, except the Montel thing. You have got to let him go.
    I kid. I know you like Jerry.